I’ve been taking a break from this entertaining site for a while, but I didn’t want to completely disappear during Academy Award time.  As the Morlocks have each explored their varied and fascinating takes on the season over the past few weeks, I tried to rustle up some photos on the theme.  You know how winners are supposed to always be kissing their Oscars, giving thanks to the gold statuette after they win?  The action has evolved into a glorious pop culture cliche, but if an internet photo search is any indication, either the kisses have been highly over-reported or they’re nearly mythical.  Where are all those kisses, anyway?

There definitely are some good ones out there, but it’s by no means seems to be a universal reaction to plant a big wet one on your newly won Oscar.  The photo at the beginning of this post, with 1957 winner Anthony Quinn (Best Supporting Actor for Lust for Life), is an excellent example of what I was looking for, a jubilant but tasteful PDA for old Oscar.  (This photo is from the excellent but much too sparse Oscar Legacy section of The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences website.)  Here’s another one from their collection, this one of Jack Lemmon, after his 1974 win as Best Actor for Save the Tiger, as he appears to be working up to a nice Oscar smooch.  In 1983, winners director James Bridges, Shirley MacLaine and Jack Nicholson — all from Terms of Endearment — didn’t kiss their Oscars exactly but they did have a group hug moment with theirs awards in hand and Shirley got a buss from Bridges, inspired by Oscar.

Actress Angelina Jolie was in a kissing mood back in 2000 when she won her award for Best Supporting Actress for her role in Girl, Interrupted.  Not only did she give a good old-fashioned Hollywood movie star kiss to her actual statuette, but this was the year she also became infamous for giving a big affectionate kiss to her brother James Haven during the festivities.  It was the smooch seen ’round the world, and it still creates a buzz when the subject comes up.

Again, not a kiss on the statue itself but a celebrated recent Oscar-related kiss was that between presenter Adrian Brody and Halle Berry in 2003 (left), when he won Best Actor for The Pianist.  The back-bending super-smooch was a surprise and a grand moment, and in fact the next year actress Charlize Theron felt compelled to lay good one on Mr. Brody when she won her Oscar as Best Actress for Monster. 

Lately the Oscar kiss has become mostly a goof, as evidenced so well by this photo of Juno screenwriter Diablo Cody, which I don’t seem to be able to embed here but you can take a look at it on Life Magazine’s website right here.  Documentarian Morgan Spurlock got into the act in 2005, seen in this photo from Life‘s site, as he kisses/humps a lifesize Oscar. 

Sometimes you can’t exactly tell whether the kiss is completely a nod to absurdity or something more sincere, maybe.  Here’s Elton John’s Oscar kiss from 1995 when one of his three nominated songs from The Lion King won for Best Music, Original Song.  It’s a bit of an exaggerated pucker, but no doubt also a respectful and appreciative gesture towards the Academy.  Probably.

How about director Pedro Almodovar’s Oscar kiss after his writing awards for Talk To Her, in 2003.  I’d say that looks pretty genuine, but then Latin men are traditionally supposed to be more free with their feelings than the rest of us.  I’d say this photo looks like it.  It’s real and it’s sweet.

Frequent Almodovar-collaborator actress Penelope Cruz won her Best Supporting award  in 2008 for her role in director Woody Allen’s Vicky Cristina Barcelona.  Her Oscar kiss is serene and I’d say heartfelt.  Very retro-looking and quite lovely.

When composer Gusavo Santaoalla won his second Academy Award in 2007 for his score to Babel, he also gave a dignified buss on old Oscar’s shiny gold pate.  Also a nice gesture filled with respect for the statuette and its history.

How about director Brad Bird’s Oscar kiss after his Best Animated Feature win for The Incredibles?  Do the Americans just take whole thing a lot less seriously than some others?  Looks like it — not that there’s anything wrong with that.

How about Javier Bardem, Best Supporting Actor in 2008 for No Country for Old Men, kissing the backside of Oscar?  Probably quite heartfelt, too.

Or Jennifer Hudson after her win for Best Supporting Actress in 2007 for Dreamgirls?  It’s kind of glammy, but also effusive and somewhat serious, or is that just an actressy affectation?   Two different Oscar kisses to ponder here.

Some of us may remember Cuba Gooding Jr.’s excited win for Best Supporting Actor in 1997 for Jerry Maguire.  At least in the photos here, he didn’t kiss Oscar, but he did pretend to eat it and then give it a playful toss.  Works for him, certainly.

Historically speaking, you also might enjoy taking a look at this lovely photo essay from Life Magazine called “Grace Kelly’s Big Oscar Night”, which was in 1955, when she won the Oscar for A Country Girl.  Though a lot of us say Judy Garland should definitely have taken home the statuette for her astonishing work in A Star is Born, looking at these photos may make you feel a little better about Kelly’s win.

Will tonight’s ceremony yield any new Oscar kisses?  We can only hope that tradition holds out and that somebody – anybody — decides to plant one on Oscar.  Anybody who’s sat through as many Academy Award telecasts as that statue has…well, it’s the least we can give him.  Oscar, we salute you, you kissable old guy!