John Cameron Mitchell co-wrote, directed, and starred in Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001). He came out to Boulder to speak about that film with a long Q&A to a full house of over 400 people. He has a warm but pixie-like demeanor that is both touching and mischievous. And he’s funny as hell, too. His comic timing as Hedwig is impeccable, and it was also in fine form last Monday night during the Q&A. Someone later told me that J.C.M had once been a comedian in the Borscht Belt. If so, it was easy to see how that might have influenced the settings for his celebrated film.

Hedwig and the Angry Inch came to life in 1998 as an Off-Broadway musical thanks to a collaboration with composer Stephen Trask. It’s the story of a transsexual lead-singer who kicks out the jams in unlikely places, such as diners, salad-bars, and cafeterias, all the while obsessing and stalking after an ex-lover who is now enjoying success thanks to material he’s appropriated from Hedwig.

Some of Hedwig’s backstory as a child living in East Germany and the son of a military man are clearly autobiographical. Mitchell’s parents, John Henderson Mitchell and Joan Mitchell, live nearby in Colorado Springs. They joined us for lunch last Tuesday at the Boulderado Hotel.

J.H.M. is a retired U.S. Army Major General who was once stationed in East Germany. He and his wife stood behind Reagan during the “tear down this wall” speech. Joan Mitchell was originally a schoolteacher in Scotland, but immigrated to the U.S. and is now both a painter and writer. Tuesday was Saint Patrick’s Day and she was all dressed in green, matching the couch behind her. At one point, Joan started talking lovingly about her dogs and seemed somewhat disdainful toward cats. Me being a cat person I felt obliged to tell her that one of my cats was a Manx, a breed well-regarded for its dog-like qualities. I told her that my Manx comes when called and sleeps in the crook of my arm every night, a fact she found a bit odd.

I then turned to J.C.M. and told him that I had a confession to make. “I first saw Hedwig at the Sundance Film Festival in 2001,” I said. “And… I kind of resented your film at the time.” The reason for this was that the first film I saw at Sundance that year was Memento, and that film blew me away. I didn’t see Hedwig until several days later, after seeing another 20 or so films inbetween, and by that time I was clearly no longer in a very receptive mood.

Hedwig was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize (as was Memento) and it won the Audience Award and Directing Award. Memento got the Waldo Salt Screenwriting Award, but that seemed like chump change to me. Hedwig was  clearly the crowd favorite. But by the time I saw it I was burnt out, my expectations were too high, my energy level too low, and in my mind, at the time, I’d already cemented my opinions and nothing could compare to the genius behind Memento.

I didn’t see Hedwig again until last Monday, almost a full eight-years later. The screening was nothing short of a revelation. I’m not a gay, transsexual rock-star, but Hedwig‘s themes of love, betrayal, and loss, this time out, had for me a profoundly therapeutic effect that felt like a hyper-audio-visual representation of the Kübler-Ross model for grief that worked through the five stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Plus, it was genuinely funny.

Now here I am talking to J.C.M. and, given that he played Hedwig, can I just say that I felt like I was talking to Hedwig directly? Anyway – in my attempt to communicate what a cathartic experience Hedwig was to watch I continue my story by saying how I’d recently been abandoned by the love of my life…

…And at this point Joan interrupts, her eyes wide with concern, and she blurts out: “Your cat left you?!”

I haven’t laughed that hard in weeks. Here we are in a hotel restaurant and I just got zinged by Hedwig’s mom. Truly, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.